You Know You're a Military Spouse When...

YOU KNOW YOU’RE A MILITARY SPOUSE WHEN…

YOU WENT TO THE ER AND NEVER SAW A DOCTOR’S BILL.

I complain about TRICARE a lot.  Sometimes with good reason.  However, I will not complain about the fact that I had a baby and never saw a single doctor’s bill.

YOU CAN UNPACK A HOUSE AND HAVE EVERYTHING IN PLACE IN 48 HOURS.

My personal record – when we went overseas, we moved into our new house on Halloween and had almost every box unpacked by sundown.  Finding the trick-or-treat pumpkins and the Little Red Riding Hood costume so your two year old doesn’t have a meltdown is a strong motivating factor.  Military spouses get very good at unpacking quickly. Perhaps it is because we know that whatever box you don’t unpack within the first 48 hours will remain unopened and pushed into a corner of the living room for the next six months.

YOU FIND MILITARY LINGO CREEPING INTO YOUR VOCABULARY.

A civilian friend texted me that she would meet me for coffee at 10:00.  I in advertently texted back, “Roger” instead of “OK.”  I have never, however, said “Hoo-ah.”

THE SENTENCE “I NEED TO GO TO DFAS WITH HIS LES BEFORE WE PCS” MAKES PERFECT SENSE TO YOU.

LES, TDY, DFAS, POV, DITY,TMO…Sometimes I think I can have complete conversations with my military friends without actually saying any words. 

YOU HAVE A RAINBOW OF LITTLE COLORED TAGS ON YOUR FURNITURE.

Unless you made a New Year’s Resolution.

YOU FIND YOURSELF EXPLAINING YOUR SPOUSE’S LES…TO YOUR SPOUSE.

My husband can fly combat missions.  He can tell you what all the gizmos and gadgets in a cockpit do.  He can interpret funny-looking weather charts and aviation maps. Just don’t ask him to figure out his LES. 

YOU CAN’T UNDERSTAND WHY YOUR CIVILIAN FRIEND IS UPSET ABOUT HER HUSBAND’S TWO-WEEK BUSINESS TRIP. 

I suppose my experience with long deployments should make me more sympathetic when civilian friends talk about their spouses’ trips. But really, when a civilian friend tearfully tells me that her husband is going on a two-week business trip, I just think, “Is that all?”

YOU FIND MOVIES AND SHOWS ABOUT THE MILITARY RIDICULOUS.

I was watching a TV show set on an army base the other day.  The soldiers were portrayed as mindless bullies, and their spouses were empty-headed snobs.  It is ridiculous how laughably outdated and inaccurate Hollywood’s portrayals of military life often are. 

YOU HAVE ENOUGH CURTAINS IN DIFFERENT COLORS AND SIZES TO OPEN YOUR OWN STORE.

The café curtains with the green and red chili peppers that looked so cute in your New Mexico country kitchen just don’t seem quite right in your next place. 

YOU CAN SLEEP THROUGH JUST ABOUT ANYTHING.

We lived under the approach path to Eglin AFB when my son was a baby.  Planes would come screeching overhead all hours of the day and night.  My newborn’s midnight whimperings could have pulled me out of a coma, but I could sleep through an air show right over our house.

YOU STILL GET CHOKED UP WHEN YOU HEAR PATRIOTIC MUSIC.

I don’t think military families have cornered the market on patriotism and national pride, but perhaps the message hits a little closer to home.  I love the National Anthem, but my personal favorite is “America the Beautiful.”  I don’t know how many times I have heard it, but the lyrics never fail to move me.  “O beautiful for heroes proved in liberating strife.  Who more than self their country loved, and mercy more than life…”

Now, if you’ll excuse me.  I think I have something in my eye.

Views: 210

Comment by Rachel Karnes on January 23, 2013 at 10:45am

You have me laughing again Nancy with your lighthearted take on the oh so accurate lives we lead! :) 

Comment by H Warren Phillips on January 24, 2013 at 11:41am
I'm so impressed with your writing!
CGP

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